Hi, I'm Tommy, and I'm the world's worst blogger

Ever. Ever. EVER.
I only wrote three blog posts (including this one) this summer. You know, summer? That time when you have a crapload of spare time and spend more time wondering what you should do with this gratuitous amount of spare time that you have? Yeah, I blogged three times. The good news is that means this post will be extremely long, and I'll get to catch you up with a series of pictures and a wall of text. Are you ready kids? I can't hear you! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,

I live on my couch in my own house. I know, crappy segue, but it was the best I could do, and I love SpongeBob so why not, right? So, this is my biggest story from summer. I've been sleeping on my couch for about a month. Why you ask? Because my room is now occupied by a 17 year old Norwegian girl named Pia. My parents decided to take her on for a full school year, and they have to have their own room. So I've been sleeping on my couch for the past few weeks. It actually hasn't been terrible, except while I've been sunburnt. The couch is leather, so you know that thing where you skin sticks to leather if it's on it too long? Imagine that while you're peeling. Yeah. Gross, right? As well as painful. But honestly the couch is quite comfy, so I can't complain too badly.

And speaking of sunburns, I have had not one but TWO in the past week. In other words, me and the sun are not on speaking terms. He gets the kid this week, I get it next, and we'll just do that until Thanksgiving and Christmas when we can just fight it out. But seriously, it's bad. The first I got last Monday when I went to Sand Hollow with my friends. That one turned my back turned a nice hue of pink, then red, then blistering red. It was my first ever second degree burn! Who said the summer before you mission can't be exciting, huh? Well the second one I just got yesterday. I was refereeing and we get to wear these super-attractive shorts that don't even go to your knees, and the back of my knees got burned hardcore. So now I get the feeling I get to repeat steps 1-3. Whatever they were. 

The next exciting bit of news is that I got the chance to spend what is probably my last week in Utah for two years-- well, aside from my 8 week stint in the MTC that I'll talk about in a minute. Sarah's friend Natalie came out and so Adam, Sarah, Natalie, and myself spent a few days in Cedar, then drove up to Brigham City for the temple open house, then went to a Real Game on Saturday night. We spent the night with my grandparents then went back up to Roy Utah for Adam's Dad's stake conference where Richard G Scott was speaking. It was a real privilege and treat to hear from a member of the quorum of the 12 apostles, as well as to walk through the temple, seeing as how I will be doing that soon. Then I headed back to Cedar, where I got the chance to stay the night with Kaleigh, Dani, Melissa, the Courtneys, and Megan. They were nice enough to let me bum it on their couch for a little bit. That was awesome, because I got to see almost everybody I wanted to one last time. We went to Sand Hollow, celebrated Dani's birthday, had a mini jam session where I pretended I had talent, and best of all just hung out! Being able to just hang out with everybody one last time before I leave was definitely a blessing before coming home and getting a nice bit of news.

Last but certainly not least is that good news: My mission call. I can't believe it's actually here. Ever since I was in primary I've heard about missions, and known how important they were, but it wasn't until January that this process became a real possibility for me. I always thought I would be a missionary, but it didn't actually happen until recently for me. I've really been praying and studying my scriptures and taking steps towards being able to go. And now that my call is here, I am SO excited to leave. I don't look forward to leaving my family, my friends, my lifestyle, my schooling, writing, blogging (what I do of it anyway), practicing my ukulele, and everything else that I enjoy that I'll have to put on hold for two years. But I know that the sacrifice will be worth it. I'm excited to serve the people of the McAllen Texas mission, and I'm excited to learn Spanish. I'm especially excited to go through the temple, to learn the entirety of the gospel of Jesus Christ, and to bask in the happiness it brings when followed in exactness, as well as the opportunity to share it with others. Am I scared? Out of my freakin' mind. But for now my excitement is outweighing my fear, and I'll try to keep it there. 

Anyway, here's a bunch of pictures of the things I've talked about. I hope that you all have had a blessed summer, and that I can keep catching you up until I leave in October. I also hope you'll keep me in your prayers and, soon, your letter list. 

SUU signs!

We hiked Kanarraville falls

Our date to go see Wimpy Kid

The car broke down and we didn't have a jack, so we just took stupid pictures

We finally made it to the temple!

Real game!

Sand Hollow!

Fun pictures! 

We were having a lot of fun in the water

Group photo! 

"Best sides!"

The girls! 

Boating!

I went boating today. If there's one thing you should know about me, it's that I LOVE boating. Like, lovelovelovelovelove it. I need to find adjectives in the dictionary. No, I need to be like Shakespeare and make up words to describe my love for it. Or just be like Shakespeare and write a hundred ambiguously gay sonnets about it. Something like that. Because I FREAKIN' LOVE BOATING.

And honestly, whoever doesn't like boating is probably like a serial child killer or something. Like, if you meet somebody who is even on the fence about boating, cut them out of your life and make sure you lock your doors man. Because something is seriously wrong with that person. Being out on the water, a soft mist sprinkling your face, the hot sun zenning you into bliss as yin and yang, heat and water, play their ongoing feud on the skin 9/10 times you're hoping will tan but it ends up just burning.

I've been able to boat about twice a year since we moved back to California. We go once with my uncle, who is incredibly fun to tube with and who I went with today, and once with my neighbors the Thackers, because they have a boat and we've been friends forever. :D



Anyway, I've gotten pretty good over the past few years with wakeboarding and such. I've learned to jump pretty well (just bunny hops, I can't jump the wake or anything.) Today while I was trying that I ate it HARD though, and got pretty bad whiplash. My neck's hurting pretty bad right now. But hey, it comes with the territory right?

However, my FAVORITE thing to do while boating (minus just enjoying the overall experience) is tubing, especially the way my uncle does it. He makes it so fun with how much he whips you around and bounces you and such. Plus it's one of those fears that I conquered because of a near-death experience associated with it (I'll put another post about it probably. Also I started another one the other night trying to catch you guys up on my summer thus far. It's a draft, so I'll finish it at some point.) Anyway, I'm really proud of myself every time I tube because it's me getting over that fear. It's one of those things that I let myself be proud of myself for. Which was a poorly constructed sentence but I'm blogging late at night again so SHUT UP.

Anyway, I just love boating. The only downside is that I lost my CTR ring. It ripped off the first time I was tubing. I've had it for like a year and a half, and it wasn't spinning much anymore because of beach sand and such. But I still miss it. It's seen a long year and a half. RIP CTR ring.

Anyway, when I get home I'll probably finish that other post about what I've been up to, and also that other one talking about my near death experience. Or maybe not. I dunno. 'Til then, stay classy San Diego.

It's much too late for me to come up with a title, much less a good one

It's 4:14 in the morning. I haven't been sleeping well at all the past several days. All the days are blurring together now, and I can't stop them from doing so. I'm trying to get on a more regular sleep schedule, so that I can fall asleep before 2 and wake up before noon. But it feels like the more I try, the less I'm able to fall asleep, and the more desire I have to sleep through alarms.

I think my insomnia might be coming back. For those who don't know, I had insomnia pretty bad from the time I was 12 'til I was 16. It was brought on by my hormones beginning to go crazy in the 7th grade, and then stopped in the 11th grade once my body had somewhat stabilized. While I had it, my sleep schedule was insane. I would fall asleep at 1 or 2 in the morning, and then wake up for seminary around 5:30. This resulted in crazy mood swings and depression a lot of the time. However, over the past two years I've been doing pretty well other than the occasion sleepless night that I've found most people have.

But for some reason, I think that it's coming back now. Probably because of stress, and all the changes that are happening (or, at least, supposed to be happening.) Lately I've just had no motivation to do anything. Nothing seems to make me genuinely excited anymore, either. I don't feel as close to friends I once felt close to, and those who I've begun to feel stronger towards are leaving on missions or are busy with their lives during the summer. I dunno. I guess lately I've just felt like I'm in a bit of a box. A box with one way glass, where I can look out, but people can't look in. It's not that I won't let people look in, heck I really WANT people to do so. It just feels like people don't want to. If I want to hang out with or see people, then I have to instigate it. I don't get invited to activities anymore. I don't get texted or called, heck I don't even get acknowledged much without some sort of instigation of contact on my part.

I've also been getting really pissed off at a lot of stupid stuff too. My car not working still/again. Myself, a lot of the time. Even stupid things like games and stuff. I started swearing again, something that I haven't done since freshman year of high school. And not even like under my breath and stuff. Like out loud, sometimes screamed if I'm alone. I'm trying to break this, but when it feels like I'm on such a short fuse because of lack of sleep I don't even notice until it's happened. I usually have so much more self control, but it just feels like lately I haven't had any. I haven't been able to control much of anything. Nothing I do, nothing people around me do, nothing that my life is doing.

People keep asking me when I'm putting my mission papers in. And each time I tell them something different. I have to, because the days pass too quickly and the problems I'm struggling with aren't resolved yet. I wish I could tell people a definite date. I wish that I could just stop struggling and figure everything out and go on a mission like all the rest of my friends are. I want to be able to do so. I've always wanted to go on a mission, ever since I was in primary and I sang I hope they call me on a mission. I always knew that I wanted to serve the Lord. But since I was 11 I struggled with church. I never built my testimony and now that I'm trying it feels like all the factors are working against me. I'm losing hope fast and honestly I don't have the mental will to really try anymore.

I know I promised I wouldn't have any more blog posts like this. I know that I said that my blog would be used to uplift people and all that. But I want to keep people updated on my life too. And right now, this is my life. Extended periods of boredom, sleepless nights, and efforts on my part that aren't panning out in the least. All these plans that I'm trying to lay aren't finding any ground to root into. So I spend a lot of my time alone and thinking, and I guess that results in blog posts and even worse things. This isn't a spot I like or even want to be in. I gotta get out of this funk somehow.